lol i just realised this blog has all the emo posts. kay so, its verified. this'll where i'll gulp down all the shitz. fly has been awful. we all know its not normal. and none can do anything bout it. we're not able enough. we're young. and we all suffer depressions. it's probs after probs. its. idk. im depressed. im saddd. lol. its all fucked up. i want a family. a norm fly. ya know? i wanna get outta here. its all shows and plays and im scared. im afraid. how long will this go on . huh. lol. why do i sound like some desperate attention seeking bitch. kthxbai.

a smile can hide much ! ==': yes , i will .

a smile can hide much ! ==': yes , i will .: "lalalalala . :D im not an expert at relationship . i dont know how to handle every problem that we're going to have , and i will never be ..."

've diz weird feeling all mushed up together at once, complicated. and yet its so full. like, idk. lol. i hate times like these, no joke. its like everything's wrong AND im so damn happy. guess i shud start concentrating on studies and nothing else. yes. nothing else :) NADA.

beijing 2010.

beijing 2010.

31st dec. 2010.

every lil' thing's not the same anymoree. shud i be glad or whaat? :)
diz feels so surreal.

december hols ?

you're worth diz much.

yesh diz is a more private blog and i love reading reading rather than tumblr. where people '' follow '' youu. hols hasnt been that awesome. especially today. totally fucked up. really. like, literally.

i love small kids.

but i hate annoying small kids.

they think they're small so they can do whatever shit they want? Like, SO WHAT?
i knew how to behave myself when i was a kid.

and things has gone really badd between me n kev. i had expected diz to happen but hadnt thought it wud end bad. Life's so not awesome right now , feel like breaking down and cryyy. -_- gahh. tears tears tears. imma lyla problem magnet now. the thing with kev, i know he wud be totally different next year, wut with staying out and .. ya know. so i thought, better to end it now rather than hold it on longer yeah? but it ended badd. really bad. but anyways. like they say, its now or never.

peer pressure. they never leave youu, do they? you want to seem perfect, look perfect, be perfect.

I M P O S S I B L E

and i thought i've became immune. pfft. so much for that.

yesterday, today, and tomorow.

hola :)

diz's gonna be an angry post :X i know i dont usually do it but some people just tend to.... gahh idkk :S

kayys. so. anyways.

you're so full of urself u dont even notice , ur so damn fake i think ur made in china? you're so damn fcking bitchy and u act like ur a friend, but ur NOT, stop acting innocent its making me puke. i hate youuu so much i wish ur better off dead . why did u even have to exist?

and YOU.

i think ur REALLY the wrong person. wrong. wrong. wrong. so wrong. i've no idea WHY i cant get you off my mind and it sucks, things being that way.

guess there's not much trust between us.
thanks for the way u've judged me. what do u really know?
ur own philosophy just made u feel good but i hate stories being made up.
it's not like what you think.
fuck it. thanks for spoiling it, again.

theOctober.

nothing's quite rigght. this week' has been a total hectic. everything's just wrong and i need someone to talk to. sound so despo right now D:
what happens when the world come tumbling down on you?
what if nothing's right?
peer pressure family probs i wish i cud turn away from all and head to a rogue of my own.
YES i loook at the bright side of things. but what happens when even the bright side looked dark? diz's my first time posting *attention seeking* post , so yeah, it suck. lol.seriously. o_O
some terrible shyt happened last nite and i just cant think straight.
everyone and everything is changing so fast.
i dont think imma catching up at all, studies-wise and school's just getting sarkish.
idk why imma complaining so much either, wont i just shut up n suck it up already?
dont think imma strong enuf diz time ;O
life is too much of a rollercoaster/roundabout.
i think i 'think' too much. like, irrelevant and unecessary stuff.
i manipulate myself too much its darn annoying and i dont even say the right things noow.
everything i do i'd regret it 2minutes later.
life is suckish right now like that. D:
imma not thinking straigght.
SOS.